Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Our Miracle

Now that Madelyn is here and we finally have internet in our hotel room I thought I'd share some details about our miracle in between feedings and muddy diapers. I'm going to try my best to do a condensed version but be prepared for a novel.


It all starts with our move to Connecticut last summer and having dinner one Sunday afternoon with our bishop's family, a family who's two youngest are adopted through the state, when a thought crossed our mind "mmm maybe that's why we moved to Connecticut... to adopt!'.  Months went by and the day we were set apart as ordinance workers for the LDS Boston Temple in February we met a woman who had adopted all four of her children. I don't know if we both knew at that moment, but I knew that adoption would be in our life after talking with this woman for over an hour. We just weren't sure how or when. However, both of us did know if we began serving in the temple, we would be blessed with a child. Part of me thought it would mean we'd get pregnant. Everyone told me if we adopted or started the process we would get pregnant but that just started messing with my thought process. So I have a word of advice: don't give that counsel to anyone who is thinking about adopting and struggling with infertility. It's not very nice for various reasons. 


The month of May came around and we contacted LDS Services to see what our options were and we heard back from the NYC office since CT was now in that "district". They were understaffed and wouldn't be able to help us unless we had another agency do the home-study for us. At the time that wasn't an option. So off to the state we went and thought it would work well for us, but after taking the first class Cony felt very strongly the foster system was NOT for us. I was hesitant at first because I felt if we didn't do anything- our chances of adopting or getting pregnant would cease. However, the second we made the decision not to go through the state, a weight lifted off my shoulders. This was around July/ August. So back to the doctor we went and the date was the anniversary my dad passed. The same day we were at the doctors we get a phone call from our bishop's wife asking us if we would be upset that she gave our names to a family who's daughter was considering placing her baby. Of course we didn't mind but quickly forgot about it since we didn't hear anything for weeks. Until the very last week of September when the birth mom contacted Kim (bishop's wife) and told her she was considering us but needed to talk it over with family during the weekend. The following Monday while I was buying pumpkins, Kim called us and said the birth mom had made her decision and wanted to place with us! There were so many emotions/thoughts going through our minds we were left speechless. The following week I've never made so many phone calls in my life and I hate the phone. The circumstances were still the same with LDS Services so we were on the manhunt for another agency that would be willing to do just the home-study and do it quickly. I'm not sure how many phone calls I made, but one agent was kind enough to say she was really expensive and knew someone who could probably help us. It was an answer to a prayer and we LOVE the agency she recommended. Lori with Rainbow Adoptions was exactly the person we needed to help us move forward.


At this point we still weren't 100% sure if we would be working with LDS Services at all, but we needed to attend a workshop in order to meet a training requirement they have and there just by chance happened to be one the following weekend in Boston. That was a miracle within it self because they aren't always in one location and could have been as far away as Ohio or earlier in the year. We learned so much that weekend and it was exactly what we needed to move forward with our relationship with Devon, our birth mom. That weekend was also special because we were able to get to know a birth mom who happens to be in our ward (church congregation) that had just placed her baby 8 weeks prior. Sophia's emotions were so raw and moving it lit a lightbulb in us that helped us understand the other perspective and that it was ok to show our excitement and trust Devon. The workshop was very magical not just because of the knowledge we gained but because the people we met. People who understood exactly the challenge(s) we were experiencing.


Some thing's are too special to share but after that weekend we felt very impressed to write an email to Devon and later we found out that our words were an answer to her prayer. Her parents too. That same Sunday while trying to listen in church, a name popped into my head for baby girl and I KNEW that was her name. We weren't agreeing on names up to that point but once I whispered it to Cony, he knew it was perfect too. Shortly after he checked my email to see if Devon had written back, she had and in return answered our prayers with her words and we had a moment between us that I'll never forget that was filled with tears. (Like I said, that weekend was magical.)


After that magical weekend, the race was on to get things done and ready but most importantly let Devon get to know us. Modern technology is a huge blessing in times like this and we were able to talk with her and meet her family. I need a whole other post to describe Devon and her amazingness. She is the most easy going, thoughtful, considerate person I know. Because adoption includes so many people and backgrounds, I've learned that adoption is the most beautiful thing on earth. And if you try to argue with me that it's not, I will fight you to the death. I'm 100% ok if I never get pregnant and have the opportunity to adopt all my children. It encompasses everything good in life... faith, hope, love, sacrifice, happiness and peace. Our hope in the next few months is to become huge advocates for adoption in one way or another. Please realize our silence on the good news was because we wanted to respect Devon's sacrifice and her personal journey, along with our journey. 


There are many more wonderful things to share but for now, this will have to do. We seriously count ourselves the luckiest people in the world because of the people we share it with. Thank you for all your prayers and service. It means the world to us. Fairytales do exist and it's the heartache we have to experience that makes life that much sweeter. God is good. God knows us and loves us and that's the sweetest gift we have....





12 comments:

Mags [Margaret] said...

LOVE. JOY. PEACE. . . and then lots lots lots more love. My heart is so full for you and Cony!!!! Xoxoxo

Suzie said...

Beautiful post & beautiful, beautiful baby! My families life has been touched more than once by adoption. What a wonderful gift! I LOVE that top pic where she has that cute little smile on her face :). Love to you!

donna said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Em T said...

That's a beautiful story and I really appreciate that you posted it. Honestly, it made me cry. And I agree about not giving that advice, by the way! Leading up to my hysterectomy, people always felt the need to tell me stories like that, and it did nothing but upset me.

Congratulations on the start of your wonderful family. It's so nice to be able to see the Lord's plan in action.

Heather S. said...

So beautiful. I got teared up too. My two oldest siblings were adopted so I too have a special place in my heart for adoption, and think it's amazing and wonderful that not only did Devon make that very humbling decision to place but for you guys to be able to have the blessing of children in your home. Congrats and God Bless you all.

Jenny @ An Apple for the Crafter said...

Congratulations Megan. We can't wait to meet her!

Jenny @ An Apple for the Crafter said...

Congratulations Megan. We can't wait to meet her.

Leah Hollett said...

MEGAN! I literally have tears streaming down my face. What a beautiful experience. And THAT baby is gorgeous! What a sweet little angel! Congratulations and much love to you, Cony and little Madelyn May!

Tara said...

I am so excited for you. I am sorry for all the hurt you had in the journey and for people that aren't sure how to be sensitive of infertility issues. My heart is so full for you two and it sounds like you guys are being blessed for your righteous decisions and desires. Hugs! I wish I could be there to hug you - but then again it would be embarrassing. I'm such a blubber when it comes to these tender moments. I think adoption is the most wonderful miracle ever.

Madelyn is such a precious spirit - I love those pictures! I'm certain she will bring you and Cony so much joy - as you will bring so much joy and happiness to her.

Anonymous said...

What a beautiful story. Madelyn is a beautiful baby and I love the name. Congratulations on your darling daughter.

Sara said...

She's perfect Megan, your gonna be such great parents... I m glad you got this opportunity!

Bettina Begole said...

congratulations from an old friend of Cony's father. I just happened on this while waiting on some students... Best wishes to all! My second grandbaby is on the way. I hope you have a wonderful adventure too.